First of all I would like to apologize.
I really was planning on posting a lot more this summer and that just didn't work out. I got lazy. I went on a trip or two. I was lazy some more.
That doesn't necessarily mean I was lazy in my Faith. I do feel like it has grown this summer. I'm not really sure how yet but soon enough the stress of school year will test it for me.
Summer always goes fast for us students. It's all been a blur- a fun, relaxing, beautiful blur. I have lots of moments that stand out to me as times when I felt perfectly content in life- licking delicious popsicles on the first day of summer, crowded onto a couch with my friends watching Audrey Hepburn, sitting around a campfire with my family, dangling my feet over the edge of a dock, laughing in a van on the way to community service, enjoying some quiet time with a friend I had really missed. Those will surely help me through any hard times to come.
I can understand why so many generations have built up the idea that going back to school is the most intense feeling of torture we experience in our adolescent lives. The exhausting hours of sitting in classrooms, late nights desperately studying things we don't understand, the anxiety of getting bad grades. All the negativity is centered around the possibility of failing *shudder*
Pretty much my whole academic life I've been a straight-A student. It hasn't been easy, but I've grown to expect it of myself. High school has really changed things. I've gotten used to not doing so well and have accepted it- but only in little things. Failing a test, for example, would be unacceptable.
Just like in so many other areas of our teenage lives, we are told that we have to be perfect when it comes to school. I know my parents just want me to do my best and that my teachers can always help me, but there's still the pressure of getting the best grades. Of not letting myself down.
Lately I've had to remind myself more and more often that IT WILL BE OK. I know I'm taking some really hard classes this year but IT WILL BE OK. I know that I don't have friends in all my classes but IT WILL BE OK. I probably won't get a 4.0 but IT WILL BE OK.
I'll get to see my friends every day and we can go to football games and have even more fun than we did this summer. There will be pep rallies and dances and cookies! (our school has amazing food). There will be good stuff too.
And even if that isn't enough, you know what will be enough? God. God has and is and will always be enough. No circumstance, no matter how happy or sad or relaxed or stressed it makes me can change that. If I'm up crying at 2 a.m. because I have no idea what I'm going to do about math then I can and will get down on my knees and pray and He will comfort me. If I'm having trouble with friends or boys or whatever, I can take a moment and read the Bible and let His words fill me up or pray a Rosary and have a nice long chat with Mama Mary. Plus, I'm lucky enough to go to a Catholic school and have theology class, so hopefully that will be awesome too.
"When you call me, and come and pray to me, I will listen to you. When you look for me, you will find me. Yes, when you seek me with all your heart." (Jer 29:12-13)
To all you fellow students, we can do this. It won't be easy but it's never easy. Actually, nothing that is worth it ever is.
To anyone who knows someone going back to school, please pray for me and them and all of us. It is much appreciated.
